How to Show Your Husband You Feel Unloved

How to Show Your Husband

You Feel Unloved

How do you, show your husband you feel unloved? I can understand why a woman would ask that question. But, here’s the problem with even wanting to show him you feel unloved. It’s like wanting a crop of corn but, planting wheat seeds and expecting corn to grow. It just won’t happen!

Love grows love, just like corn seed grows corn. It’s a simple law of nature, similar to the law of gravity. Oh sure, laws can be manipulated for a while to get around them but, every plane still has to land or it’ll crash.

And showing your husband you feel unloved, what kind of outcome can you expect from that? Just to take a guess, I would say maybe, some pity or some sympathy sex? I think even you could agree with me that’s really a far cry from the kind of love you’re looking for.

So, let’s approach this from another angle. How well do you really know your husband? How well do you think you really know yourself? Do you really know what makes you tick or how about your husband for that matter? Chances are your ticks are not as synchronized as you thought.

For instance, what’s your definition of love? Have you ever written it out? Chances are, NO you haven’t. Do you know your husband’s definition of love? Again, chances are NO you don’t. And that’s where a real problem lies.

It’s always helpful to speak the same language but, even then men and women lose a bit in the translation. It’s the difference in the sexes thing. You see your idea of love and your husbands do have quite a bit in common or you wouldn’t even be married. Yet, they are still a bit different.

If you were to ask a hundred different people what their definition of love was. You would get a hundred different definitions with some similarities. And it was those kinds of similarities you found in common with your husband you chose to build your relationship on. But, neither one of you were looking for the differences at the time. There’s no wonder they say love is blind.

We’ve all heard hind site is 20/20 but, is it really? Sure, we’ve all said things we wish we could take back and we’ve all done stupid things we wish we hadn’t. But, after 53 years on this earth I believe things happen for a reason.

Those things I’ve said and the stupid things I did, taught me a lesson, not to say or do them anymore. But hey, isn’t learning what life’s all about anyway? When we stop learning they tend to throw the dirt in our face. Okay, maybe not exactly in our face but, on top of a box they ship us under ground in.

Without meeting or even talking to you. I can guess this much about you. And please feel free to correct me with a comment if I’m wrong. You’re not here by accident, you came here because you want a better relationship with your husband. Which tells me you haven’t given up on your marriage and you’re still teachable so, you’re not ready for the dirt in your face thing .

Most of my readers only feel like they’re buried with their relationship problems but, they’re still above ground.

And I can’t tell you how happy that makes me feel that you’re even here! Did you see what you did to me? Just the thought of you coming here got me flustered and I got into your head and lost my train of thought. But, it’s not you’re fault it’s just that I have a problem doing a one way conversation. Where was I? Oh yeah, we or a I was talking about the interpretation of love.

And it’s in the lack of understanding of those differences that makes you feel unloved. Chances are he’s feeling a bit unloved too. So, don’t blame your husband for you feeling unloved when the real reason is because, of a lack of communication.

I’m sure your husband has a lot of great qualities but, being a mind reader is NOT one of them.

Let me share a secret with you sister. Your husband wants to understand you and please you. On the flip side of that coin he wants to be understood too. So, help him out a bit. Pull up a blank word document or a pen and paper and write out what love means to you.

And really take your time with this. When you think your done let it sit for a day then reread it. You may even want to add something or rephrase it. Keep it to yourself for about a week and keep reading it before you share it with him.

And in the meantime try doing some of the things for him that makes you feel loved. After all you can’t go too far wrong since love begets love. Then, when the time is right and you have some quite time alone with your husband, say to him I’ve given this a great deal of thought and would like to share my definition of love with you.

You shouldn’t be surprised if he has questions about your definition. Because, men often times have trouble understanding emotional issues especially, when they come from a woman’s perspective.

Then after sharing, tell him it would be beneficial for us both so, you could understand him better. And you would consider it a big favor, if he would write out his definition for you, when he can find the time. (Now, you will increase your chances of getting him to comply to your request if you don’t pressure him.)

He probably hasn’t given this much thought before. So, it could take him a lot longer to put it into words. But, if you’re patient and keep doing the things for him that make you feel loved, it’s most likely he’ll give you his definition.

However, for some odd reason he doesn’t, here are four common things in most men’s definition of love. And if you will give him these things consistently he’ll feel loved and do his best to make you feel love too. Respect, Appreciation, Admiration and Sex.

And Honey, by trying to figure out a way to show your husband you feel unloved is one of the most harmful things you could do for your marriage, other than having an affair. (I’m pleading with you PLEASE; don’t open up that can of worms!) If you want him to love you make him feel loved. It’s as simple as that!

After you’ve taken my advice that I’ve given you right here. And when you’re ready to generously reward yourself for taking action then you need to check out “Text The Romance Back” to give your marriage the love life you both deserve.


Tell you what I’ll do for you, if you will share your definition of love in the comments below, and put in your real e-mail address. I’ll send you a chapter from my book that’s not even for sale yet “The Keys To Love” where I touch on this subject.

Until next time,

Your home is your world

So, keep it positive.

Think you ahead of time for your comments

Chris Baker


  1. michelle lim
    Posted October 8, 2012 at 5:23 am | Permalink

    Love is to endure, trust and be there for each other. But it’s always easier said then done.

  2. Teresa
    Posted May 10, 2013 at 1:54 am | Permalink

    Love is being the best friend, share your dreams with one another and just be there to listen

    Chris: Thank You Teresa, for sharing your concept of love with us.

  3. kay
    Posted July 5, 2013 at 6:16 am | Permalink

    love is understanding each other in every situation good or bad, love is caring with just looking into each others eyes, love is holding tight to each other and feel like im one of the wealthy people on earth, love is when i know my partner is with me even he is not present with me.

  4. Jennifer
    Posted December 13, 2015 at 2:00 am | Permalink

    My description of love, is laughter, even at ourselves. Being touched, hand held, play with my hair, I need to feel it physically. And I need to hear it, I need to hear the words in order to feel it. LIKE, get home safe, call me when u get there, I love u baby. Some kind words. I feel very unloved lately. 25 yrs of marriage, have we drifted apart? I feel, see, the change. I’m very lonely

  5. Kamil
    Posted April 20, 2016 at 6:51 pm | Permalink

    Love is giving your all, being patient, kind, not jealous or proud, not rude or selfish. Being calm, forgiving, truthful. Never giving up. Staying Faithful, hopeful, strong, sensible, true and honorable.

    Christopher: Let me know if you got my e-mail to you.

  6. Sharon Hogg
    Posted May 27, 2017 at 9:32 am | Permalink

    Struggling right now, love my husband so much, but don’t know if he feels the same anymore. My definition of love is faithfulness, kindness, respect and caring.

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