Words of Encouragement for Women

Who Feel

Unloved by Their Husbands

I would like to say thank you to the gal who typed in, “words of encouragement for women who feel unloved by her husband”, to find this site. Even though I’ve touched on this before, you’ve inspired me to approach it from a different angle.

It’s not uncommon for women to feel unloved by their husbands. Even though it’s sad it’s not uncommon at all. We all get busy with our lives doing the best we know how but, sometimes our best doesn’t seem to be good enough.

Let’s face it, we all have to work with the knowledge we have. No fault to her though, they don’t teach this stuff in school. And chances are she or her husband was a product of a broken marriage. And as hard as we try not to be like our parents, we have to admit they are a major influence on us.

May God bless her though; she was looking for an answer! I’m just sorry I wasn’t there for her when she needed it. Do I have all the answers? No, at least not without all the details, all I have at this point is my perspective of her vague cry for help.

So, if you have a few minutes I’ll share my thoughts on her situation with you.

She’s looking for some encouragement and we all could use some of that when we feel down. What could possibly make a person feel more down than thinking their mate doesn’t love them anymore? Losing a job or wrecking a car may seem terrible at the time but, when we have a mate who loves us. We can make it through without getting too down about it.

There are only three main things that make people tick and feelings are at the top of the list. How we feel will affect our attitude and in turn it affects the way we inter act with others. We all want to feel special, appreciated, loved and respected. It makes us feel good about ourselves when we’re treated like that.

Yet, we don’t always treat others in a manor to make them feel good about their self. Quite often in a marriage the couple falls into their own little routine and unintentionally starts taking each other for granted. So, instead of making our mate feel special they feel replaceable. Instead of feeling appreciated they feel used. And when they feel like that, they’re not feeling loved or respected.

People normally act according to their feelings. So, if we don’t feel loved we usually don’t express it to others either. The problem with all our feelings is every one of them has a negative side. The good news is feelings can be changed and sometimes rather quickly too.

As an example; the wife goes out and changes her hair style maybe different color and length. She may be unsure if she even likes it. When she comes home and her husband raves how cute she looks. She starts feeling proud of her choice, her confidence goes up and she’s feeling sexy.

On the other hand if he belittles her about her hair. Her confidence goes down she may feel ashamed and ugly. It’s just goes to prove how much power a mate can have over their spouse with their words.

The point is; we all need to feel approval to feel good about ourselves. When we feel good about our self our confidence level is up. And we’re more apt to be out flowing with positive inter action with others. In others words loving toward the ones who show us approval.

The flip side to that is; we tend to avoid others who don’t or won’t show us approval. Because, they bring our confidence level down which make us feel bad about our self. When we feel bad about our self we tend to be less than loving toward others.

We could compare it to the difference of being slapped in the face and a pat on the back. The former hurts our feelings with disapproval and the pat on the back makes us feel better with a gesture of approval.

Now, to change an unloving marriage back into a loving one isn’t all that hard. It just takes consideration and consistency. That is consideration of our mate’s feelings, before we act or speak. And do it consistently because, if we don’t they feel unloved and then we do too.

For women feeling unloved by their husband, she should make him feel special. One way to do that is, if she is on the phone when he comes home. Say “I have to go my husband just got home” and hang up. It shows him respect and that he is more important to her than the other person. I know one lady who will pick up the phone just before her husband opens the door just to let him hear her say those words.

Warning: For women who have had an affair or if for some reason he doesn’t trust her, it may backfire!

Another way to make him feel special is by using common courtesy. When asking for something, don’t make it sound like a command. An example; “pass the salt”. Better yet, “when you get a second could you pass the salt please”. See the difference?

The first one sounds demanding like he has no options. And all hell is going to break loose on him if he doesn’t follow the order now. The second one sounds more like a gracious request that lets him take his time to fulfill.

And try to never miss an opportunity to show him appreciation. With something as little as passing the salt, a simple “thank you” is sufficient. On bigger things it may require a different kind of compensation. The point is; you never want him to feel used or taken for granted or he’ll treat you the same way.

The bottom line is; you want to feel special, appreciated, loved and respected and so does your husband. The reason you got married in the first place was for those feelings. And chances are if those feelings are missing from your marriage than so is the romance. How long do you want to live like that?

So, go ahead and set any negative feelings aside along with any unforgiveness. It’s up to you to choose if you want to be lovers with them or your husband. And if you wait too long your husband may take the hint that it wasn’t him you chose and leaves. So, take the lead to give him those feelings first. And you’ll find the love you’ve been missing in no time.

And when you’re ready to kick up the romance a few notches check out “Text The Romance Back“. With just a few simple text messages you can have your mate in desperate anticipation to make up for the lost time.

If you have a few minutes to watch Michael Fiore’s video, he can show you the right way to turn your cell phone or computer key board into a romantic remote control. And fire up the desire to ignite the passion again. So your husband will give you all the love and encouragement you’re craving.